One month ago on Thursday September 8th, Scott and I woke up early at 5:30am to head to the hospital for my scheduled induction. My parents were asleep downstairs as we tried to sneak out as quietly as possible.
It was still completely dark as Scott and I loaded up the car and made the 20 minute drive to the hospital. On the way we didn't say much because it was just so surreal that we were about to have another baby in a few short hours! We checked into the hospital at 6:50 and we were lead to the corner room at the end of the hall. Luckily I was the first labor of the day so I was able to snag the most spacious room with beautiful views of the mountains. The nurses started to hook up my IV and get me comfortable for what I thought would be several hours of labor. They decided to check my dilation immediatley and to everyones shock I was a 4 and 100 percent effaced, meaning I would have probably gone into labor on my own that day. At around 7:30 a nurse informed me that the doctor on call was going to be doing a shift change but he would love to come in and break my water before he left.
I was a little taken back because I hadn't even received my piton or epidural yet and I had always had my water broke after both of those things. I was a little nervous that breaking my water was going to hurt since it had always broken when I couldn't feel it, but I was pleasantly surprised that it didn't hurt at all, but it was the hugest gush of water. Peeing your pants doesn't even compare to how intense it was! Around this time they started my pitocin and asked me when I wanted my epidural. In both my previous labors I have opted to get the epidural ASAP since I really wasn't interested in feeling any pain at all. This time though I had a crazy thought. Spur of the moment I decided I wanted to wait as long as I could without getting the epidural so I could experience true labor.
The next hour I relaxed and put on my makeup as the pitocin kicked in. It wasn't very long before I started to feel some pretty good cramping and contractions. At first I thought it was kind of funny and would joke with Scott "oh that's a good one!" but pretty soon they started to get more and more intense and weren't so funny anymore! They say with pitocin the contractions are worse and more painful than natural labor, so my pain started coming hard and fast.
It started to get to the point that they would stop me mid sentence and I would have to concentrate on the pain, and over the course of the next 15 minutes they got worse and worse to were I was wincing and gritting my teeth. At that point I decided I wanted the epidural and called for my nurse. She came in to check me and I was an 8! I was shocked and freaked out because I was progressing so fast. We then decided to call my mom and tell her to come over to the hospital. I told the nurse I needed my epidural, but that was when I was told that there was now a wait and he would be in as soon as he could. Well that didn't go so well for me because within 10 minutes I was DYING!!! It was one of the most painful things I had ever experienced and I started to twist and move into any position I could to get comfortable...(FYI, there is no comfortable position by that point). After 20 minutes I was starting to feel like I was going to throw up, so I yelled to Scott to go find them and get me that epidural NOW! He reminded me that there was no way to make them go faster and that I just had to wait, but luckily within 5 or so minutes he walked in the door! He joked that he was probably my favorite face I would see that day, and sheesh no kidding. At that point I was in so much pain that I felt like I was going to pass out. He started to explain what he was going to do and I wasn't even listening and honestly didn't care, I just wanted that epidural now. I asked him how long it was going to take to kick in, and he paused and looked at a nurse kind of concerned. He asked he what number baby this was for me and how far dilated I was. When she said 3rd and 8 I about died when he said "ummm...I'm not sure we are gonna be able to get this in on time" because of how far along i already was and how long it would take to work.
I started to get really upset thinking that there was a possibility that I was about to have a natural labor. That was not something I had planned for at all, but I suppose that is what I get for gambling with my epidural! Luckily he told me he was going to try and "cheat" and give me a higher dosage that works quicker than a traditional epidural and it should kick in within 10 minutes. He had me sit up on the bed and hunch over with my feet on Scott's legs, and I started to pass out from the pain! They had to wait on the epidural until I was conscious and alert enough to sit completely straight and still. Finally they were able to get it in and within minutes, HEAVEN. I had never been so glad for modern medicine in my life!
I didn't get much time to really relax and enjoy my epidural because within 15 minutes I started to feel the urge to push. Luckily my mom arrived right on time and Scott grabbed my nurse to check me again. This time I was a 10 and it was go time! The doctor came in and asked me what kind of things I would like to see happen with my birth plan. I told him that I really wanted to do delayed cord clamping and skin to skin right after the birth because I didn't get a chance with either of my babies before and it was super important to me. He explained that as long as everything goes smoothly and baby is healthy those were things that would be just fine. Now this baby was posterior sitting which we had known for a few weeks (which means the baby is sitting face up in my stomach instead of face down, and this can sometimes cause complications), and they agreed that they would try and turn him as he came out so we could avoid any extra issues. I started pushing but within a few minutes they told me that they were concerned because the baby's heart rate was dropping. The doctor and nurses discussed for a few minutes and then the doctor said to me "Morgan, there is meconium in his water, we need to get him out as soon as we can, so we need you to push as hard as you can." I was totally caught off guard because neither of my other babies had this happen so I was not sure what to expect. This was the hardest part of my labor because now with the meconium situation I was not allowed any breaks, I had to push through with no pauses. It was hard to even catch my breath, but I buckled down and pushed harder than I ever had with either of my other labors.
Then I heard them saying, he's coming out, he is coming out! And just like that Roman Shay Allen was born at 9:53 am after a 2 hour labor and pushing for 5 minutes! I opened my eyes and see the doctor slide him out and flip him over. He was completely grey and purple. At that moment everything started happening so fast I had no idea what was going on, all I knew is that I got no skin to skin because he passed the baby off to a nurse, cut the cord himself, and they rushed him over to the baby station. I knew what that meant, that everything had not gone smoothly and I was started to freak out. I hadn't even seen his face yet and he felt so far away from me. I kept asking if he was ok over and over and the doctor and nurse told me he was ok, he just needed a little help, but I watched him on the table completely limp and not making a sound. I watched them lift his arms and they just flopped over. I could tell by their faces that he was not ok and I started to get really angry. I turned to my mom and told her that I'm not blind, it is obvious that something is wrong. At that point they were suctioning him and giving him a CPAP, and we would later learn from the pediatrician that he had to be revived. It was terrifying. They worked on him for what seemed like eternity and the whole time I panicked not knowing if my baby was going to be ok...and then the most beautiful sound a momma could hear, a cry! It was tiny like a little kitten, but that was all I needed to get the water works going.
They came over and told me that Roman needed to get an IV so they were going to take him down to the NICU, but I could hold him for a minute. I was so incredibly relieved and happy to be holding my sweet beautiful boy. He was perfect in every way. The most precious little face and tons of dark dark hair. I was incredibly glad that he was here and safe. It just reminded me how blessed I am to have him still be healthy after some scary complications! Roman ended up having an IV most of the time we were in the hospital, which was sad cause he kept scratching his face with it. They also required us to stay the full time in the hospital so they could monitor him closely, but other than that he has been perfect and we love him so much!
Unfortunately we didn't get many photos of his birth because everything happened so quickly and chaotically, and the ones that my mom did catch of the baby were a little disturbing because he didn't look very alive, so I have decided to keep them private, but we are so grateful for all of the love we received from his birth. I truly have the best followers ever and I am so honored that you would want to share in this journey with me. Thank you from the bottom of my heart!